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Text File  |  1996-02-14  |  4KB  |  140 lines
  1.  
  2.                    THINGS TO DO WHEN YOU'RE BORED!
  3.                    -------------------------------
  4.               Downloaded from the Internet by Tony Kelly
  5.            Author: unknown! But it's freely copiable stuff!
  6.  
  7.  
  8.  
  9.                            Wax the ceiling.
  10.  
  11.               Loosen the lug nuts on your dad's new car.
  12.  
  13.         Drop your cat from a high place, to see if it really 
  14.                      does land on all four feet.
  15.                      Repeat above until failure.
  16.  
  17.                  Rearrange political campaign signs.
  18.  
  19.                          Sharpen your teeth.
  20.  
  21.                Play Houdini with one of your siblings.
  22.  
  23.                         Braid your dogs hair.
  24.  
  25.                  Clean and polish your belly button.
  26.  
  27.                   Water your dog...see if he grows.
  28.  
  29.                              Wash a tree.
  30.  
  31.                      Genuflect to Larwence Welk.
  32.  
  33.                Knight yourself and some close friends.
  34.  
  35.           Found the Jim Jones' School of Modern Bartending.
  36.  
  37.                        Flirt with an evergreen.
  38.  
  39.                          Scare Stephen King.
  40.  
  41.                        Give your cat a mohawk.
  42.  
  43.                                 Purr.
  44.  
  45.                            Mow your carpet.
  46.  
  47.             Rake your carpet (to clean up the clippings.)
  48.  
  49.                                 Whine.
  50.  
  51.                   Play Pat Boone records backwards.
  52.  
  53.                        Re-elect Richard Nixon.
  54.  
  55. Dress like your favorite Heavy Metal group...surprise your grandmother.
  56.  
  57.                         Listen to a painting.
  58.  
  59.                           Play with matches.
  60.  
  61.                             Buff your cat.
  62.  
  63.                   Raise professional racing ferrets.
  64.  
  65.                   Paint your home...day-glo orange.
  66.  
  67.                        Dial-a-Prayer and argue.
  68.  
  69.                   Read Homer in the original Greek.
  70.  
  71.                              Learn Greek.
  72.                           Change your mind.
  73.                            Change it back.
  74.  
  75.                    Watch the sun...see if it moves.
  76.  
  77.                 Mail Jerry Falwell a Hustler magazine.
  78.  
  79.                 Recite Roman poetry...to your toaster.
  80.  
  81.                          Paint your windows.
  82.  
  83.                                 Smile.
  84.  
  85.                             Paint a smile.
  86.  
  87.                        Shoot at a fire hydrant.
  88.                            Apologize to it.
  89.  
  90.  See if you really can build a small nuclear device in your basement.
  91.  
  92.                      Rotate your garden...daily.
  93.  
  94.                             Plant a shoe.
  95.  
  96.                                 Sweat.
  97.  
  98.            Give a Rorschach (Ink-blot) Test to your gerbil.
  99.  
  100.             Take apart all your major kitchen appliances.
  101.                        Mix and match the parts.
  102.  
  103.                       Take your sofa for a walk.
  104.  
  105.                      Dial 999... breath heavily.
  106.  
  107.                     Go to a funeral...tell jokes.
  108.  
  109.              Put lighted EXIT signs on all your closets.
  110.  
  111.                           Starch your shoes.
  112.  
  113.                      Get a dog to chase your car.
  114.  
  115.                           Let him catch it.
  116.  
  117.                        Form a political party.
  118.  
  119.                        Throw a political party.
  120.  
  121.                           Climb a sidewalk.
  122.  
  123.                         Ride a loaf of bread.
  124.  
  125.                            Annoy yourself.
  126.  
  127.                        Get angry with yourself.
  128.  
  129.                       Stop speaking to yourself.
  130.  
  131.                           Kiss and make-up.
  132.  
  133.                          Stand on your head.
  134.                     Stand on someone else's head.
  135.  
  136.   Read a Harlequine Romance Novel...but only if you're REALLY bored.
  137.  
  138. END
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  140.